i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
