Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
