Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize