we're making bets on your personal life
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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