We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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