so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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