writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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