That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
