i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
