I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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