Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
