she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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