I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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