Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
