what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
