He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
