your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
that's an acceptable place to lick
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
