I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
