It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
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