Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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