he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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