Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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