I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
