We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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