oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize