my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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