We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Randomize
