No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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