i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Randomize
