Your dad touched me again.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
