well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
