I'm drive I can fine osifer
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
