Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
