just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
drinking out of a sandbucket again
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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