I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
