Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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