Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
