therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
