I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
