Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
