is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
