so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
