yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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