I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
