He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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