im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
