You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
