I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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