I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
