Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
